Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
she peed on how many people?
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I will be naked everywhere
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
