Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize