I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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