How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
My pussy is not your playground.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
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