when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Randomize
