when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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