I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Randomize
