The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
