i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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