Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize