Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize