I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
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