So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
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The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
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There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
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