Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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