If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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