I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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