I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
