youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize