You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
she looked like the before picture.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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