nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
