i just had sex bonerless
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize