She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
