im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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