Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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