I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize