dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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