Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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