Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize