Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
