I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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