the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
