Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
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