We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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