But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Randomize
