glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
oh god the rape fog is back!
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize
