I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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