Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
