the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.