just come out here and I will go home with you...
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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