wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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