last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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