glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize