Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
