"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Randomize
