nut hugger
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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