I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
