piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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