Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
