id be glad to
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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