the condom got lost in my hair
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize