But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize