I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize
